This year I tried not to punish myself with finishing albums I wasn't super into or force feeding myself material I had little interest in but wanted to have an opinion on it when the inevitable "whatabout"ers came spouting what they deemed to be worthwhile efforts that I had excluded from my list. But as a result, this is the smallest tier in the 4 years of doing this that I've ever had. Just three records make 2022's "worst of" list. These are the three calamities so appalling that I just had to finish to see how terrible things could get. Kinda like the Don't Worry Darling Press Tour.
#126. Hella by Just Friends
I'm just kind of perplexed at the mere fact that this band exists on a label with the likes of Drug Church, First Blood, Prince Daddy or Terror when they don't sound like they'd even be edgy enough to be the villains in a Camp Rock reboot. I'm not sure who this album is for (maybe the 14 people feeling nostalgic for Gym Class Heroes?) but it is very much not for me. A bubble gum funk-pop hip-hop crossover that's unbearably syrupy sweet and reaches Rebecca Black's "Friday" level of contrived catchiness. "Honey" has a decent hook and "Fever" has an okay groove but any momentary benefit of the doubt they earn on those tracks is entirely spent by the time they spell out "S-t-u-p-i-d" like a DIY startup Black Eyed Peas.
#125. Physical Thrills by Silversun Pickups
Silversun Pickups have been a solid middle card indie rock act for the better part of the last decade. And while they've never achieved breakout success, they've never really put out anything that's felt this empty and frankly, half assed. The vocals seem off-key, the arrangements are hollow and bloated and worst of all, the electronic elements and gimmicky production flourishes feel like a lazy attempt at misdirecting the audience with the notion that there's something creative happening under the unnecessary layers of distortion. There's not. It's like trying to sell a dead Christmas tree by covering it in cheap tinsel. The lowlight comes on "Hidden Moon", which sounds like a song made for a CW teen vampire series.
#124. Funk Wav Bounces Vol. 2 by Calvin Harris
Remember when Calvin Harris was the hottest producer on the planet there for a minute? The dude just brought so much energy and passion to everything he touched but this record here feels as forced and uninspired as anything you'll hear this year. Even the features feel like contractual obligations. This dude went from the cutting edge of pop music's integration of EDM to recreating bad filler music from 1970s daytime television. What happened? The entire experience is packaged as an exotic getaway but this feels more like a mandatory work trip weekend filled with so many obligatory team building exercises that you never even get to leave your hotel. Instead of going out clubbing with Rhianna and Frank Ocean you're cornered at the hotel bar by Busta Rhymes.
View the Rest of the 2022 Year in Tiers Here:
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